I’ve been bed-ridden all day since three this morning… I am really sick.

Again, another verse that I had forgotten about:

Psalm 121

I lift up my eyes to the hills-
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the LORD ,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip-
he who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

The LORD watches over you-
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.

The LORD will keep you from all harm-
he will watch over your life;
the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.

Take care and have a wonderful day.

Making prom plans today. A strange irony presents itself: I’m preparing for what should be one of the highlights of my adolecent life while in the midst of one of the most trying times.

Two of my good friends are have a tough time, too… One committed a horrible act, and the other has been hurt deeply. Pray for that situation, please.

Talked with my mom this evening about stuff. I’m glad we’re becoming closer, but I feel such sadness for her and the life she’s had to live, as well as the life she’s living and the cards life has dealt her. We’re in this thing together to face the evil one, whether he be of this earth or not, but it doesn’t get any easier.

Everything continues to crash down upon me. The stress is building up; my life is overloaded. I want to scream, I want to curse. I know I need to rely on God, but it’s so difficult some times. !!!

And things just get better… (sarcasm) Thanks to Greg for pointing me to this verse. Funny how you’ll read something a thousand times, but then when you need it, a whole new meaning presents itself.

Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 3:12-14

I must hold onto the hope that God knows what is going on in my life and He, ultimately, holds the reigns. I’ve become numb.

Consider these opening lines from my college application essay:

One of the most wonderful things this world has to offer are the struggles we all endure. Yes, I wrote that correctly! And I’m sure you’ve heard the old adage that trials produce character, but it goes so much deeper than that. I have walked through difficult times that, in the moment, I could only wish to pass up, but in hindsight I realize that they have prepared me for the future and shaped who I am. Adversity should not be a stumbling block at all, but rather a basis for personal maturation.

I’m sitting here, recent news of personal conflict fresh on my mind, contemplating whether or not those words of mine really do hold the truth which they bear witness to. I am forced to consider events of my past, the pain and torment experienced within, and the strength and insight gained from them. A man once stated that God’s creation process is not completed at birth, but rather it is fulfilled through the struggles we encounter during this lifetime. Perhaps the view isn’t so bad from the outside, but at the moment my only wish is to avoid the coming storm… and to erase the scars already sustained.

Oh, Lord God! Bring your promised comfort to me! My heart can withstand no more. “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.” (Luke 22:42) Your prayers are needed and appreciated.

My day was filled with seranading, working, and playing. I woke up before the crack of dawn and headed over to Caroline’s house where I preceded to set up a miniature scavenger hunt, which eventually led her into the garage where I was waiting in her car, guitar in hand, to sing a little dittie that I wrote. That amazing piece of lyrical work ended with the simple question, “Will you go to prom with me?” Caroline’s answer, thankfully, was a resounding “yes!” (Or it least a sleepy, “yeah.”)

After the morning’s events, I drove back home and fell back into bed and slept till 12:30, at which time I began work on a site design for my new job. The most exciting part of the day was being able to take Caroline to the Westside Clay Court Championships, courtesy of my new boss. Our excellent seats were front row, at a cost of $7,000 each for the week of play. The first match was pretty exciting and the second wasn’t too shabby, either. I actually know a tennis name now, James Blake, and I must say that he’s a pretty cool guy. Most interesting to me, was observing the social atmoshpere of the event. The stands were filled with big names and money-makers. For instance, my boss bought four seats in our box and the other four were purchased by the vice president of St. Joseph’s hospitals, who makes well over seven figures a year. The night was very enjoyable and I can’t say thanks enough to my boss.

Unfortunately, prom complications are already coming in, so we’ll have to see. I’ll post about them later, along with pictures of Ignite and the tennis matches (hopefully).